Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I didn't die. Yet.

So I'm still alive. Okay, maybe half alive. Alive enough to get out of bed and sit here and read blogs and comment people back. And hopefully they all make sense. But I still feel like crap. And I'm going back to bed soon. But since the fever has finally gone away, I'm pretty sure I'll live.

I did not go to the doctor. Partly because I'm too tired to put on clothes other than pj's and ride the half hour into town. Partly because if I don't have the flu, I probably would by the time I breathed the same air as all those other sick people. And partly because I'm a mom. I know the drill for rest. These are my observations from yesterday...

1.) The Campbell's "soup at hands" are really convenient for sick people. Easier to hold in bed than a bowl and spoon. However, if you eat the chicken and stars one, all the stars sink to the bottom. This results in a huge lump of pasta stuck in the bottom of the container at the end.

2.) If you happen to be watching a SyFy marathon of Outer Limits episodes and you fall asleep during one episode and wake up during another you will be highly confused.

3.) Daytime TV is insipid.

4.) Used tissues multiply at roughly the same rate as rabbits.

5.) Taking your temperature with a thermometer under your tongue becomes virtually impossible when your nose is completely stuffed up. Only olympic swimmers can hold their breath long enough to accomplish this feat.

6.) Cats really like sick people. You may wake up with five of them sleeping in various positions on your bed. I'm pretty sure they just like the heat you give off when feverish. Or maybe they're just waiting for you to die so they can eat you.

7.) Sean can fend for himself way better than he lets on.

8.) "Cootie Girl" is apparently a term of endearment.

9.) If I look bad enough (or sound bad enough) my husband will avoid contact with me. This has never happened before. Considering he has the constitution of a horse and almost never gets sick from being near me when I'm sick, I can only assume I either look worse than usual. Or he's succumbed to the reigning paranoia thrust upon us by all the media coverage of the swine flu pandemic. Dammit...I want my cuddles!

10.) I truly thank the powers that be that the SK book was delivered to me so fortuitously. At least I have something wonderful to read!!!

And thank you all for your comments and well wishes!! I truly appreciate them. And hope that I can get back to what passes for normal at my house very very soon!!!

'Scuse me, I need a nap now,


  1. Hey, glad you're alive. This is a funny post! I'm reading Under the Dome too. Love Steve!

  2. Oh, you poor poor thang! I am sending you cyber soup, fluids, antibiotics, vicks vaporub, a vaporizer, some Nyquil and a bottle of Knob Creek.

    I hope you feel better soon!

    You're getting sleepy.......

  3. I hope you feel better, Cootie Girl ;)

  4. Glad that you're more alive. And I agree daytime tv sucks Thankfully there is DVDs and a dvr.

  5. Im staying with the tomato soup at hand...but oh man will that stuff ever burn your mouth. (pfft, warning labels!)
    My cat likes me when I'm sick too...Not so much the other way around. I hate it when he sneezes in my face! Cat Boogers!
    I Hope you feel better real soon Spot.

  6. Aww, Cootie girl ... even sick as hell, you are still funny as ever.

    Love the cat line - I feel fairly certain that they are waiting you out ... 'specially since in my house nobody would remember to feed the animals if I didn't do it ...

    I'd tell you to try the wet wool socks, but we both know that won't work :(

    Hang in there Spot. We are routin' for ya!

  7. Tina~ OMG! How good is it?? He's so amazing!

    Kathryn~ NyQuil and a bottle of wine? Good lord...I'd sleep for days. Thanks!

    Whispering~ Thank you!

    Roxy~ thanks! But there's no DVD player or DVR in my bedroom! And that's where I was.

    Mark~ Gross! I'm glad cats can't get whatever I have, because I'm pretty sure I sneezed on more than one of them.

    Danica~ Thanks. I'm pretty sure the cats got fed. They kind of circle your ankles like sharks when they know it's time to be fed. And none of them commenced gnawing on me, so?


  8. Dang..doesn't that man know cuddles are staple in getting better! Very funny post! Love the reference to tissues!

  9. Get better, Spot! Whenever anyone is sick around here our dog smells our feet. Kind of like, he might be able to tell when we're on our last leg and wants to be there just in case. Sick.