Tuesday, March 9, 2010

I should have been a doctor, or at least played one on TV

This post is probably going to ramble and make no sense, I'm just warning you ahead of time. I'm having trouble stringing together cohesive thoughts because I'm high on cold medicine because a cold virus has invaded our house. I'm pretty sure Bobby brought it home because he was sick last week. I told everyone not to kiss him or drink after him but hubby thought he'd be all funny when I said that and pretend to kiss him. He didn't kiss him but he did put his hand over his mouth and he probably got germs on it and then didn't wash it. So basically I blame them both. Because now hubby has it, I have it and Sean has a freaky rash on his arm. I don't even know what that's about but I'm hoping it's not contagious too. Because if I have to add an anti-itch pill I'll probably pass out and wake up next week sometime.

Anyway, I've decided that I missed my calling and I should totally have been a doctor. Really, it doesn't even matter that I hated Biology, I've got mad diagnostician skills that could have been put to use saving humanity. And I know this because last night Lu and I were watching "Mystery Diagnosis" on Discovery Health (yeah, that channel again). And the lady was having horrible pain and her legs kept turning black. It was gross. And it made my legs feel all squirmy and I got kind of nauseous. But I persevered and when I looked at her legs I said~

Me: You know, those kind of look like petechiae that you get Lu.

Lu: I've never had that many of them and they don't turn purple or black.

Me: Yeah, but they can. They can join together and make bigger spots called purpurae. I read about it. That's what those look like. I bet Dr. House would put her butt on steroids. That's always a good first call.

Lu: You know Dr. House isn't real right?

Me: Please don't disturb my fantasies with your reality. It annoys me.

Then on TV the Doctor says the purpurae were appearing right before their eyes.

Me: Oh! Who called it?! That's right! Me!

Lu:*rolling her eyes* Lucky guess.

Then they decided she had cryptoimmunoanemia. Or something else equally hard to pronounce. But it was because of some crazy antibodies.

Me: AHA!! It was an immune system dysfunction. And giving her steroids would have helped because it would have shut down those antibodies. I should totally be a doctor!!

Lu: I think it might be a little late for that kind of career change.

Me: *shrugs* whatever.

Then I got up to Facebook a friend to set up lunch for today and Lu kept watching the show. But then she got mad.

Lu: OMG! Remember how she forced her husband to leave her because she felt unloveable? Well when she got all better she found a new guy instead of going back to the old one. What a hussy! I'm not watching this anymore!

And she turned off the TV and left. But I was absorbed in FB by then so it didn't matter. I was excited because Mckenzie at unabridgedgirl had found me and friended me. I told Lu that I'd adopted Mckenzie now and she was my new daughter and Lu was very jealous. She's kind of like that. And then I realized that I have like 153 FB friends. That must mean I'm very popular, yo. So if I became a doctor, I'd have tons of patients. You'd all come see me, right??

There's a new post up at G & H to check out. And if at all possible, there will be a new review at What Spot Saw as well!

Have a fabulous Tuesday,


  1. If it's all the same to you, I think I'll stick with my regular gyno. But thanks!

  2. "Please don't disturb my fantasies with your reality. It annoys me."

    OMGOSH, Spot. You just made my day. * GIGGLES *

  3. petechiae <--- I have never heard that word until today. Thanks for teaching me something.

  4. sure go on back to med school...but what are all your blogfans gonna do then, huh? we can't all move to Spot-town (wherever you are). but i guess you could start a blog diagnosis service. hey! that might work.

  5. Yeah...well, you know what they say...."It's not all about book-learning."

    You could probably hold your own against many a licensed professional, sweetie.

    Now, I've got this pain....

  6. "You could probably hold your own against many a licensed professional, sweetie."

    I going to agree with Kathryn, just from reading this rambling post made more sense than some instructions I have gotten from Doctors.

    Are you accepting new patients?

    Enjoyed the visit, will be back.

  7. Dr Spot paging Dr Spot. Just trying out the new paging system here at Spot MD. Lol.

    Hey hope you get to feeling better. Way too much snow and illness this winter.

  8. Dear Dr. Spot,
    I have a had an area specific headache for over three weeks now, I know it is the ongoing result of a bad case of whiplash I sustained years ago. But what I want to know is if long term treatment involving grappa and Xtra Strength Tylenol is the most effective/harmful way to go about it?

  9. You missed your calling, but you can always be a doctor of philosophy..."Please don't disturb my fantasies with your reality. It annoys me." Love that quote! Can I use that one as my FB status?!

  10. Isn't Dr. House cool? I mean he just wants to be loved but hides behind a mean fart persona!

  11. But of course ... do you have an opening for Friday afternoon??

  12. Shoot..I can navigate Web MD like a Harvard graduate. Maybe we can partner up? =)

  13. I would so go to you! Just remember, its never sarcoidosis, or that thing that it never is on House which I can't spell.

  14. Elly~ fine. But if you find yourself at the center of a medical mystery...I'm here for you.

    UnA~ why thank you dear. =]

    WW~ your so welcome. I've only known what they were for a year.

    DfG~ I'm too lazy to go back to school. Can't I just get like a Discovery Health license or something?

    Kathryn~ and sometimes you're forced too! They think they know everything!! Geez, like they went to school for a bazillion years and all, but I'm a mom!

    Jimmy~ always open to new patients and new followers! Thanks for the visit and the comment!

    Angelia~ Haha. I love it! And yes, I'm sick of people being sick.

    Brite~ omygosh. Lu had whiplash once. It sucked. I'd totally recommend Motrin because it would help the inflammation as well. Or vicodin and vodka work good too. Your choice. Where did I put that prescription pad...?

    Suzicate~ you can indeed use it, but only if you look me up on FB and friend me. =]

    Hadassah99~ I've had a crush on him for so long...*sighs* I love the tough exterior. And so smart! He's perfect.

    Dani~ for you, I have an opening anytime!

    Mindy~ For sure! How about the Suburban-Spot Health Center? Specializing in treatments recommended by Dr. Mom.


  15. Tina~ haha. Okay. I'll never diagnose that!


  16. Do you take United? It'd be awesome if you could diagnose stuff via the internets, it would so eliminate those annoying wait times...Although I'm a little concerned about the short attention span. ;)

  17. This post got lost to the waste side after the mention of House. I totally drifted into lala land. Sorry.