Sunday, April 18, 2010

Sean and I come up with ways to make money...

Want to know something weird? Ha! I don't even know why I bothered to ask. If you came to my blog, you either love the weird or you didn't know any better. So here you go- my butt hurts. Not in a gross way (my gosh, the places that comment could go...). But no, I meant like the muscles in the fleshy part. And since the Dr. grounded me from all sorts of physical exercise it's obviously not from that. But that's what it feels like. That muscley ache you get when you worked out too hard just enough. The only explanation I can come up with is that I must have compensated for the crazy knee by walking funny. And all that hobbling around (and if you must know, I had to kneel to clean out the fridge) must have overtaxed said sore muscle. Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. The arthritis medicine she gave me is actually working quite well and the knee doesn't hurt much until evening. Then it aches, but not too badly. I haven't even needed the vicodin except the first night.

So on to the funny stuff...Sean and I were on our way to town the other day~

Me: (I'm driving, he's riding shotgun) You know what makes me happy?

Sean: Pistachios.

Me: Oh yeah they do! But that's not what I had in mind.

Sean: Fountain Cokes.

Me: Oh gosh yes! But again, not what I was going for.

Sean: A really good scary movie?

Me: Oh definitely. *silence* Sorry, I got distracted.

Sean: A new book, lazy Sundays, vodka?

Me: Wow. I'm really easy to please, aren't I?

Sean: Yes. And distract. But do go on...

Me: Anyway, I was going to say air conditioning.

Sean: that does make you happy.

Me: I know right?! I'm so cranky when I'm hot! Know what my car (yes, the one we're riding in) doesn't have?

Sean: Air conditioning.

Me: Bingo. Know why?

Sean: Because you trusted Dad & Porky to fix something.

Me: Well, to be fair, Porky does have a degree in fixing engines. But yes, that's why. But the reason I trusted them to fix it is because I don't have any extra money. If I had a lot of extra money, I would just take it to a different shop and pay them to fix it because then I'd be guaranteed it was fixed. Otherwise I could take it back and demand that they fix it and presto! It's fixed. So basically, the point of this conversation, in case I lost you with my logic, is money. And how we need more.

Sean: Oddly enough, I was following your train of thought. So do you have a plan to get this money?

Me: Um. No. But I'm working on it. I mean I'm doing the freelance gig, but I'm definitely not going to get rich anytime soon. And because I'm doing the freelancing, I have less time for the fiction, so publishing a bestseller, that will then be optioned for a blockbuster movie, is maybe going to take a while. I need some more immediate cash. I got this email from this guy about this new business venture and the initial investment is pretty low and you get it back relatively quickly.

Sean: Is it legal?

Me: Um. I'm not sure. It looks like a pyramid marketing scheme to me. But there was a video on the website about how it wasn't a pyramid marketing scheme.

Sean: Uh huh. Well that makes it legit. NOT! Do you really think they'd tell you it was an illegal pyramid marketing scheme?

Me: No?

Sean: Of course not genius.

Me: Well, I don't know. Lu watched it too and said she'd sign up. And then I only have to get two more people... and I had my cynical New York friend check it out.

Sean: Hold up! You seriously took Lu's opinion into consideration? Have you lost your mind? Lu! She thinks the world spins faster when the wind blows. Not a reliable source. What did your friend say?

Me: *sigh* that she thought it looked to good to be true. I already knew it did. But I was supposed to start making $4000 dollars a month the first month. That's a lot of money. You know what we could do with that kind of extra money?

Sean: get the air conditioning fixed?

Me: Buy a new car. And go on vacation. Like every month.

Sean: Hmm. That would hamper my job schedule. Wait. If you were making that much money would I still have to get a job?

Me: Of course you would, you slacker. Geez. You owe me money. But just until you were 18, then I'd sign you up to make thousands of dollars a month too.

Sean: I think this is a bad idea. How do you know they aren't the mob?

Me: Why would they be the mob??

Sean: Because the mob has their hands in everything. Maybe they are the mob and the money is from killing people.

Me: Um. Well. If I didn't know that's what it was from I don't think I can be held responsible. So it's okay.

Sean: Nah, I'm going to stick to my plan...

Me: What's your plan?

Sean: I'm going to take over Slovakia. Then I'll have my own country.

Me: Why Slovakia?

Sean: Because it's small and no one really knows much about it. Then if I need more room, I'll annex the Czeck Republic.

Me: Um. It takes money to run a country. Where are you going to get that from?

Sean: I'm building weapons factories. We're going to become the world's largest manufactures of weapons.

Me: Mmmm. I don't know about this plan...

Sean: Doesn't're part of the mob, I'm not letting you in my country.

Me: But can I buy weapons?

Sean: Of course, if you have the money.

To be continued...

Happy Lazy Sunday,


  1. You two are nuts...but such entertainment. I really would have loved to hear Lu right in the middleof this convo! Thanks for the Sunday morning laugh!

  2. You guys crack me up. And you keep me very entertained. Have a great Sunday!

  3. Mwahahahaha...Sean and The Max both want to be dictators in their own countries! Is this some kind of GenZxyabcd adolescent response to the times?
    BTW As far as I can tell your problem with accessing my blog maybe related to using the IE browser. I'm working on it...cuz I miss your comments!

  4. Man I love Sean. I would totally help him obtain weapons grade plutonium for his new business...for a piece of the action, of course.

  5. Weeelll, the only thing is, I think Sean's plan is more sensible than the non pyramid sales plan. But not to worry, pro rates soon....

  6. HA! Love your conversations! Love that somehow YOU wound up in the mob and Sean's dealing illegal weapons out of a little-known tiny country.

    Tell him I'd re-think that idea he had of re-naming it Seanville...

  7. Spot, this had me falling of my chair I was laughing so hard. That is golden.

    For mob members-Crap, now what do we do that Sean's found us out? I guess we could convince the mob boss to boycott his weapons. Or maybe Spot could refuse to feed him until he gave us them free >:)

    For other people-That's ridiculous! How can he accuse you of being in the mob *shifty eyes*

  8. I love how a conversation starts one way and then takes on a mind of its own. Let me know when Sean rules Slovakia! :-)

  9. OK I have a question, does Slovakia spin any faster when the wind blows like the rest of the world does---and if not is that another reason you want it Sean?

    Loved the post Spot.

  10. Love it! I love air conditioning too. I hate being HOT! Makes me very cranky! Love the idea of taking over Slovakia too. Great post! :)

  11. Omigawd!!

    You guys are too frickin funny.
    I wanna live in your house too ... can I? I'll bring Vodka and Pistachios ... and Fountain pop. Can't do the scary movies or I'll pee the bed.

    PS - Why T-F were YOU on your knees cleaning out the fridge, Spot??

    I would clean your fridge for you if you let me live there :)

  12. Spot, I heart you! I love reading convos between Sean and you. They make me laugh. Also, just remember that if something does sounds to good to be true, it normally is...But you already know this! :)

  13. Your conversations always make me smile.

    And I love fountain diet coke. Yum.

  14. When it's too good to be true, it usually is. But it's nice to chat about. Makes for interesting dialogue. Well written!

    But DON'T DO IT!

  15. Suzicate~ sadly, Lu was out of town and missed this one. You're welcome! Glad to entertain.

    Peg~ thanks! We aim to please.

    Brite~ I don't know. I think it's just a smart boy thing. Or maybe I let him watch too much "Pinky & the Brain".

    Elly~ Sorry. He says he doesn't need "partners", he has "minions".

    Tina~ from your mouth to the Universe's ears. Wait. Do you think the Universe has ears?

    Kathryn~ I told him if he was running it, he should call it "SLOBvakia".

    DorkVader~ you had me laughing! Sean's definitely coming after you for money. Watch out!

    Hadassah~ don't worry! I'll be sure to give you a head's up!

    Jimmy~ Thanks! He's now decided to annex the Ukraine as well. He's power hungry.

    Stephanie~ Thank you ma'am. Who doesn't love the idea of having their own country??

    Dani~ you can for sure move in! I'm going to have an empty bedroom come august.

    UnA~ I know. But it's fun to dream about getting rich by doing nothing. =]

    WW~ thanks! Eeeewww...on the diet though.

    Guys~ Thank you! Don't worry, Sean talked me out of it. Damn that kid and his logic...


  16. Uh oh. I better invest in some more ammo.
    You should totally start a blogisphere mafia Spot :D