Sunday, August 2, 2009

Road Trips & Reminisces

So I'm nearly packed! I only have three more loads of laundry to do and dinner to cook and I can relax for the night. We leave at 7 am tomorrow morning for Ohio. It's an 8 hour trip. 8 hours on the road with my son & daughter (biologicals). Good thing I like them, eh? We will only be gone for five days, but that's enough to rejuvenate. I like to have the alone time to reconnect with them after their month of camp. And really, with my daughter, it will be the last road trip we'll take together while she lives under our roof. Strange that. And even more importantly, it may be the last trip we take together without the "C" word being a part of our lives. I honestly haven't put much more thought into that. The surgery's now a week and a half away and I think this trip will help keep it off my mind.

So I'm having some issues with my daughter leaving I guess. I thought I was doing all right with the concept, but I seem to have some unresolved anger with her. I don't know what its stemming from. We just seem to start arguing every time we try to talk. She takes offense to everything I say. Maybe it's because she already has one foot out the door. And she resents any attempt at "mothering" on my part. Maybe I'm having some abandonment issues. I wonder, do all mothers feel that way when their daughters leave? Seems like it would be normal to me.

But on to road sister and I practically grew up in the backseat of my parents car. My dad was in the Air Force so we never stayed in one place long. Inevitably there were at least to treks a year back to the Midwest to see family. One at the holidays and one in the summer. Thankfully, there were only the two of us to cram back there. Although we probably did enough fighting for three or more kids. I always liked traveling at night best. That great feeling of dozing just between asleep and awake. Caught in that twilight land, looking out the window at the night sky and then the huge sweep of lights as we'd pass a well lit interstate exit. There was even something great about stopping at the gas station, a quick trip to the restroom, then climb back into the nest we'd made of the backseat, kick off your shoes, and snuggle back down. It was comforting to be cocooned in the bubble universe of the car hurtling through the night to a familiar destination. Man I miss being a kid sometimes.

Tell me about your road trips and I'll tell you about mine...

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