The one about werewolves and corndogs...

<----These kind of werewolves. Not these kind of werewolves--->

I know. Right now you're sitting there wondering what the french toast werewolves and corn dogs have to do with each other. Don't get ahead of yourself. All shall be revealed.

So Mike left Sunday night for Camp Eastman. They're doing a new joint crew week this year and he and Phil ended up being the crew weeks two deep leadership. In non-Scout speak: Mike had to go hang out with the ranger at the other camp and watch over the 8 boys who had come up for crew week. They'd spend half their week up there and half their week down here, doing projects for both camps and then having some fun time too. I'm used to Mike being gone a lot so I didn't figure it was a big deal. Except that, inevitably, the weird shit always happens when he's not here to deal with it. Like the time the limescale remover that he told me to put in my dishwasher actually ate the dishwasher and turned my kitchen into a lake. Or how he left me the first week we moved out here and being a city girl, I'd never heard coyotes. I nearly wet myself in fear. But it's whatevs. He's got a job to do.

So I'm sitting alone Monday evening. Sean is at a scout meeting and Mo & Dylan have just gone to bed. I fire up the DVR to watch a Lifetime movie (don't judge, it was about an artist who talked to an imaginary friend), and I'm maybe twenty minutes in when the phone rings. It's Mike.

Mike: Sorry. I know the baby is in bed. But is Sean there?

Me: It's Monday night. He's never home on Monday nights. (you'd think the man could get this schedule down. Sean's only had scouts on Monday nights for the last like 9 years.)

Mike: Shit.

Me: What do you need?

Mike: I needed him to go down and unlock the Cook's Cabin.

Me: Why?

Mike: The DE who was going to move in last week just called to see if I'd unlock it, but I told him I was up here. So he said he'd stay in Polar Bear as originally planned, but I think I locked it when NYLT left this weekend.

Me: Okay. I'll go down and unlock it. Which key is it?

Mike: You'll have to check that yellow sheet and find it.

Me: What yellow sheet?

Mike: The one on my desk. Or maybe the other desk. It's there somewhere.

Me: It's on top the printer. Alright, got the key. Do you have a flashlight somewhere? It's hella dark out there.

Mike: Um, somewhere. But the outside lights on the cabin and dining  hall are on so you should be okay.

So I go out and get in the car and drive down to the parking lot, where I find the gate closed and locked. At this point, I have two options. I can drive back to the house, call Mike and try to find the key to the gate, or I can just walk the rest of the way to the Cook's Cabin and unlock the door. I figure walking will be faster. Its about five feet into my walk that I realize it really is hella dark out. And I'm alone in camp. And there are dark woods everywhere. First, I start to wonder if coyotes or raccoons ever attack people. Then I start to worry about snakes. Then, as I'm passing the health lodge, there's a large commotion behind it, and I can make out the bushes shaking fiercely. Then I start to think about werewolves (again, no judging! I watched Teen Wolf that night). Then I speed up my pace and keep glancing over my shoulder. Then it dawns on me that is EXACTLY what people in horror movies do just before something really bad happens to them! CRAP. So I hurry to the safety of the lights of the dining hall, cross to cook's cabin to find...the damn door is already unlocked. WTF?

So I turn around and start the trip back to my car. I'm still uneasy and glancing around nervously. I mean, I have to walk right past the health lodge again. And by now, it's dawned on me that if a werewolf sees me, I probably look like a corn dog to him. I'm plump, juicy, awkward and slow. Might as well be meat on a stick. Yep, I'm the fair food of the werewolf diet. Fabulous.

I'm now also slightly pissed off. I made a wasted trek through the scary, dark woods at night. I get home and call Mike back.

Me: So the gate's locked.

Mike: No it's not. It's just dummy locked to make it look locked.

Me: Well I couldn't get it open.

Mike: Yeah you have to blah...blah...blah.

Me: Don't you think that would have been pertinent information to give me before I went down there?

Mike: oh, um, yeah?

Me: *Dramatic pause for effect* The damn cabin was already unlocked! I walked, WALKED through the dark to the cabin for you and it was already unlocked. You're lucky werewolves didn't eat me.

Mike: I was afraid of that. Wait? What? Werewolves?

Me: You thought the cabin might be unlocked and you didn't even tell me that? Do you know what I look like to a werewolf?? A corn dog, that's what!!

Mike: *laughing* A corn dog? *more laughter*

Me: You owe me big time, mister!

Mike: *still laughing* Okay,  pumpkin. I love you.

And the best part? That was only the beginning of the night of weird shit. I'll write about the rest of my evening later. And no, I never did get to finish the damn movie.

Stay away from werewolves and dark woods,
♥Spot

The one where I begin (quietly) freaking out...

Yes, you read that right. I know, I'm usually not given to freaking out. And I'm definitely not given to public acknowledgement of freaking out. But there you have it. Why this behavior you ask? Because Friday is the day. The day of my knee surgery. Um. Yeah. I do know that it's supposed to be a very simple surgery. Yes. I do know that the incisions are tiny and require only one stitch. Sure I know that I should be completely healed up in a week. So why am I freaking out? Because last summer they gave me the same song and dance and I ended up with a 4 inch gash and major recovery, oh yeah and then it go infected and then I found out they nicked an artery while they were in there. So pardon my freak out, but me and surgery are not on good terms.

I visited Mike's aunt yesterday and we got to have a long chat. We have very much the same personalities and outlook. Having been through what she's going through just last year, we were able to really connect. I zeroed in on her exact fears because they were the same ones I had harbored. I think our talk helped some. And I know the trashy magazines, travel bottles of soap and shampoos, and Lindor Truffles I took her helped. A girl has got to have her stuff. Fortunately, so far they haven't found anything that specifically points to cancer. Now it's a waiting game til surgery when they can remove the cyst and biopsy it.

Lu and I both have doctor appointments today. Mine to discuss some hopefully minor stuff and hers with her hematologist to check her blood counts. Positive thoughts that they are good please. Then she sees the surgeon on Thursday and she's hoping to get released for work.

After the doctors visits we will be going to the visitation for my friend's husband. I'm wearing tons of waterproof mascara.

Sean started his full time job today. I think I was ten times more nervous than he. I packed him a lunch. I can't wait to hear how it goes.

And Mike and I had this conversation this morning~

Me: (knocking on his office door and entering) Um. So I wanted to give you the bad news in person since I'm such a supportive wife and all.

Mike: (turning to me expecting a money issue I'm sure) What?

Me: I'm really sorry, but Bob from "Bob and Tom" died.

Mike: Um. Ok.

Me: He was in a car accident in Arizona.

Mike: Um. Huh.

Me: I thought you loved that show?!

Mike: Well I don't get to listen to it very often.

Me: Whatever. That's the last time I break things to you gently. Next time you get a Post It note.

And today I received an email from one of my Kindle readers. How cool is that?! I always wonder about them. You know, who they are and how they found my blog, ect. So thank you Donna from Texas for the blog love! It was great to hear from you.

Happy Tuesday,
♥Spot

The one where I want to throw in the towel...

Alright Universe, you win, I give, now quit the crap! First, let me apologize to my faithful readers for leaving you hanging and for not getting to comment on anyone else's blog. I've lost two Kindle subscribers (go on, desert me while I'm down, rude!) but gained two followers. Weird, huh? Anyway, hello new followers! I'm normally funny and consistent, I promise.

So, here we are roughly five weeks after Mike's accident. He's doing well. Very well for someone who almost died. And let's not mince words, he did almost die. And sometimes I still have flashbacks to that trauma room in the ER and I shudder. Luckily for him, he doesn't remember that part. But he does remember coming to after the accident and being stuck in the truck and unable to breathe. But it's not so bad. Because those are the memories that make us realize he almost wasn't here any longer. Those are the memories that remind us to be thankful. The memories that remind us to be grateful for one another.

The surgeon says he's healing great and he doesn't need to see him anymore. The GI doctor cleared him. The kidney specialist doesn't need to see him for three months. Ah, but the medical doctor. He's the one who won't let him go back to work just yet. (Thank you Dr. Andrews!) Mike's doing well except for a funny little drop in blood pressure. Forty points to be exact. His BP drops forty points when he stands up and his heart rate increases the same, making him a prime candidate for another fainting episode. Remember the last one? Yeah, me too. Let's not do that again! So he took back his driving privileges and said he had to have supervision at all times. He's not a happy camper. In fact, he argued with the doctor, who then told him he was acting like one of his kids. (This does explain where Molly gets it from). In the end, the doctor won, of course. But I got to listen to Mike complain and bluster about it. It was then that I realized thinking I'd never get annoyed with my husband again, may have been a tad unrealistic. And then we had this conversation~

Me: So this is what I'm getting from all this...you are so bored spending time with me and can't wait to get back to work and away from me. That all that time I spent helping to keep you alive and healing was for nothing because you don't care if you go back to work too soon and have an accident. Nothing matters except what you want and that since you didn't get you're way, you're going to behave like a 5 yr old.

Mike: I really don't understand how you can twist things like that. What kind of mind do you have? I don't mean any of that! Except maybe the not getting my way part.

Me: Whatever. I see how it is. You can just start taking care of yourself again buster.

Mike: I'm sorry sweetie honey punkin-poo (um. okay, so did anyone just throw up in their mouths a little? He only uses this name when he knows he's in deep sh*t) I'm just so bored and ready to get back to work.

Me: Mentally yes. Wait for the physical to catch up please. Two weeks and you see him again.

Then there's Lu. Poor Lu. I waver between deep sympathy for her and extreme frustration. She wants to schedule her disease around her life and it doesn't work that way. Sometimes you have to schedule your life around your disease. She went in for her first IVIG infusion Tuesday. Her platelets had dropped further to 78,000. We had been told that the infusion would take about four hours. Well, it took six. But they give her tylenol and benadryl before hand so she slept for the first 3 hours. But then she was angry that it took so long, when she wanted to get back to camp. It's staff week at the camp she works at and she hated taking time off. The next day she had a severe headache and nausea. They gave her meds for it when we went in for the infusion and since she'd done well the day before, they got to go a little faster and it only took four hours. But that night she started running a 101 degree fever, severe headache, nausea, stiff neck, kidney pain, aching legs and rash. I called the doctor first thing in the morning.

Here's where it gets stupid...the doctor's office made me bring her in to their office. She had blood taken first and then luckily they took pity on her and got her back to a room with a bed so she could lay down. The doctor came in finally and examined her and then said it was all side effects from the IVIG. No Sh*t Sherlock!! I told you guys that on the phone. You made me drag her in here for that revelation?! Then he says to take her home and give her tylenol. For real genius?! Tylenol? Yeah, so I've already done that because it's not my first day wearing the Mom hat. It did nothing for her. So after much discussion, he ordered painkillers and nausea meds. Hello waste of time. Couldn't that have been accomplished over the phone?? You know, while my child was sleeping in her own bed?

The good news was that her platelets were up to 145,000 so the IVIG is working. Hopefully it will buy her four weeks of higher counts. Next blood test on Thursday. When they do the IVIG next month they said they would stretch it out over 5 days in hopes of reducing some of the reaction. Hopefully that works. Luckily, she's better, only a much less intense headache has hung on. She did see the surgeon and set up a date for the splenechtomy. August 17th. Unfortunately, it will be a full surgery, not laparoscopy. So there will be a smallish scar under her left ribs. The surgeon has promised to make it as pretty as possible, no railroad Frankenstein thing like her Dads. Lol. But she will be in the hospital for 5-6 days and have a 4 week recovery.

And then, there are the results of my MRI. Guess who gets to schedule her surgery sometime when everyone else is doing well? Yep, me. Turns out my meniscus is torn. And the chrondomalacia is severe. The doctor asked how I was walking around on my knee without chewing on painkillers all the time. I told her no one sent me the memo where I had a choice?! Anyway, hopefully it will get taken care of in September. Seems like a relatively easy surgery compared to the others. Two small incisions on either side of my knee to remove torn part of the meniscus and shave away some of that roughened cartilage on the back of my kneecap. Maybe that knee won't make that grinding noise anymore! And then a week on crutches and I'm good to go.

Well, I wouldn't want to leave you thinking we've had only bad news this week. So in the good news category: We had an awesome 4th of July with my sister and her family. Great food, swimming, and some small fireworks for the girls. Kids and sparklers are so much fun! Sean got his class schedule set and is officially a college freshman! And I got a new (used) SUV that I love. And I didn't get any rejection notices this week on the stuff I have out on submission. So there is positive. Always. And there has been funny. I promise funny next time.

Hope everyone in blogland and facebook world are doing well. Your emails, comments and well wishes are always appreciated. Even if I don't have the time (or energy) to respond, know that they make me smile.

Happy Saturday,
♥Spot

The one where my week pretty much blows...

So I'm pretty sure the Universe is laughing at me. Because the theme song of my week seems to be a frustrated "AAaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhh". Things are not going according to plan. Who am I kidding? Things are screwed up this week. Sunday was the last good day. Bobby graduated, we all went to dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant, and Mike, Sean & I watched a movie and I went to bed early. Monday, Sean and I went to town to check out enrolling him in the local community college. I'm still waiting on them to call and tell me what all hoops we have to jump through to get him enrolled due to the homeschooling and the fact that he finished up a year early. Tuesday I had a whopper migraine. I don't get them very often anymore but this one was a doozy. I stayed medicated all day, much to Sean's amusement. About 5 o'clock, I'm lying on the couch in the family room watching a movie on Lifetime Movie Network (no wisecracks, it was a scary movie) and Sean come in and asks~

Sean: what's for dinner?

Me: I don't know. I texted your sister to see if she'd pick something up, but I haven't heard back.

Sean: well hopefully you'll catch her before she gets home.

Me: No it might be better if she comes home first.

Sean: and then has to drive all the way back? Really?

Me: I have no idea what I just said.

Sean: well you said she should come back here first, but maybe you meant she should stop there first?

Me: I don't think so. I think I meant for her to come here first, but I don't know why?

Sean: you're so stoned. You should probably just stop trying to talk.

We did indeed get food and I went to bed early, after not talking much. Also on Tuesday, I emailed a client and told him that I thought our work together was at an end, because I wasn't happy with what I was doing for him. I expected him to be angry. Nope, he agreed and came back with an offer for a bigger project. It was surreal. I could use the money, but it really detracts from the fiction writing time. My husband is urging me to go for the fiction, considering it's what I really really want to do. But it's hard to pass on an interesting project and the money it would bring in. (OH MY HELL!! Did I really just say something that sounded all grown up and responsible??!)

Wednesday, I was headache free. I talked to Kathryn on the phone, finished emails, read some blogs and then the kids convinced me to play hooky and go to the lake with them. It was gorgeous. I didn't feel like swimming, just laying lazily on the dock. (It had a lot to do with the fact that due to the heavy rains, the lake is kind of muddy and gross and reminded me of Shrek's pond). We discussed how scary jumping into the lake is the first time every summer when no one has been it for awhile. There are some ginormous grass carp in that lake, every bit of 6 feet in length. There are multitudes of other fish and snakes and other critters. Lu said she really was a little scared when she'd gone swimming with Luke the day before. (On a side note, it probably doesn't help that when we first moved out here I told them the story of Stephen Kings story "The Raft". And I told it while sitting on the dock out in the lake. I then jumped in and left them there for a few minutes. Mom of the Year award, right??!)

But they jumped in and swam out to the dock anyway. Lu asked if she was drowning would I get in and save her. I told her no. But of course, I would. Then they jumped off the dock a couple of times. Then Lu was laying on the dock, Sean was swimming, and I was laying on the dock by the beach. Suddenly Sean says~

Sean- Oh holy crap! I just realized that this is a setting for a horror movie. Lu on one dock, you on the other and me swimming in between. The next thing that happens is I get eaten by something! *he climbs swiftly up the ladder to join Lu*

Lu~ Yeah, and mom would run to the truck and leave me.

Me~ duh. I'm not getting eaten, and you still have the long swim to shore.

This week has somehow sapped my mojo. I haven't really gotten much written, including blog posts and comments. I find I'm filled with self doubt every time I sit down to write. I look over things and think "crap. this sucks. a middle schooler could have written this." And it just makes the task seem that much more daunting. I was having a moment of doubt yesterday and asked my husband~

Me: What if I CANT finish the novel??

Hubby: Then I'll beat you.

He said it with a serious look on his face. I convulsed in giggles. No indulgent "of course you can, honey" from him. You have to know him to realize how out of character what he said was, but seriously I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe. It was exactly what I needed.

Today he called while driving to another city to pick up some stuff for camp.

Hubby: How are you feeling today?

Me: Like crap. I have a tummy ache and I think I might hurl.

Hubby: That's no good.

Me: No. I think I got it from Luke. He's been complaining of a tummy ache for a couple of days. He's like freakin typhoid Mary. I swear every time he comes down with something I end up getting it too even though I rarely come within 3 feet of the boy.

Hubby: Maybe you're just not used to his cooties.

Me: or maybe he gives them to Lu and she doesn't get sick but passes them on to me, like "haha. this will screw with mom"

Hubby: yes, I'm quite sure that's exactly what she thinks.

Me: I know right?! It's a plot. How's your day?

Hubby: Stressful. It's going to be a miracle if I pull off everything I need to pull off this weekend.

Me: I have faith. You can do it.

Hubby: well that's one of us I guess.

Me: besides, if you don't, I'll beat you.

Hubby: Wow, it sounds even funnier when you say it! *Laughing*

Me: Whatever. Don't even play like you're not scared. I'm fierce.

Hubby: You're so cute when you're fired up.

Me: I'm cute all the time!


So from now on, I'm going to focus on fiction writing. I have a publisher who is waiting to look at the novel as soon as it is done. I set a tentative date for the end of August, because I work best with deadlines. Tina from
The Clean White Page and I both sent story submissions to a magazine this week. And we're both working on storys for a contest next month. I have loved Coyote Con. I'm sorry to see it end this weekend. But I have plans to attend
CONtext the end of August in Ohio. Some of the really fabulous people I met through Coyote Con will be there, and the writing workshops look awesome.

I also want to focus on the blog, because I love this blog. I love the friends I've made and their support. I also love having this record for the kids. And writing the funny day to day stuff is different than writing things to scare you. So hopefully the blogging will return to a more regular schedule. Oh, and I sure hope Heather notices how I took her advice and put my awards on a separate page!! =]

Also, I've enjoyed reading all of Suzicate's poems. She is a fabulously talented poet, and if you haven't read them, you should. It has made me miss writing poetry as well. I used to write a lot of it. So I think I may be either adding a page or a blog for poetry. Just for fun.

And...(my gosh Spot, aren't you done YET??) I put up a new movie review at What Spot Saw.

Happy Thursday y'all,
♥Spot

Burn, baby, burn.

So it's been a busy week. I've been to town three times this week, when normally I shoot for once. Tuesday was grocery shopping and dr. appt. Wednesday was job hunting with Sean. And Thursday was a dr appt for Lu and two medical tests for me and a job interview for Sean. Like I said, busy, not much fun and I'm exhausted. I'm also trying to get all the household things taken care of so I can leave for Myrtle Beach on Monday night. Where I plan to spend a week doing not a whole hell of a lot. Should cancel out the suckfest that was yesterday.

But Wednesday night, hubby had to burn down an old picnic shelter. They are making room for a new archery range to go in that spot and the old shelter had to go. He'd already dropped the roof, so basically it was the roof on top of the concrete slab with brush between and brush piled on top. So he texts me at 5:30 "Are you coming down to watch? We're ready." Um. Not really what I wanted to do, I mean it's really cold out, gonna be dark soon, and I don't feel well. But in the interest of being supportive and since he obviously wanted me too, I went. Couldn't talk Sean into it though. So I pull up and park on the side of the road and then walk out to the shelter. It's him and his volunteer F. Then some other people show up who wanted to come out and watch. So he lights it. There's no whoosh and it explodes in flame. I guess that's just in the movies. In fact, it's burning so slowly that I completely understand why the local fire department didn't see the need to be here. I'm bored. And thinking about the fact that I still have to make supper when I go in.

So I ask him "Is this it?". And he tells me no. Just to wait and eventually it'll get going really well. Then I tell him he should have reminded me to put long johns on because it's really cold. He assures me that soon the fire will be keeping me plenty warm. Yawn. Sure. But eventually one side catches really well and if you squat down and look through the rafters you can see the fire being sucked to this side. That was pretty awesome. And the next thing I know, it's really burning. And flames are shooting up in the sky. And I'm not cold. In fact, I've taken several steps back. And then some more because the front of my jeans are really hot. Now the fire is going in earnest and it is a sight to behold. I'm mesmerized. And then I remember that I'm scared of fire. Like really scared. Like I think it would be one of the most horrible ways to die ever. I think I might have died in a fire in a previous life. Probably I was burned at the stake. Then I think about this movie that I watched when I was younger called "The Legacy". And how this lady was standing by the fireplace and the fire leapt out and got her. I take several more steps backwards.

But honestly, the fire is beautiful. It is a wonder to behold. Looking at the burning rafters, it's almost like the flames are performing this intricate dance. They look like their moving in slow motion. It's almost hypnotic. And in places where it burns through the roof, the tar from the shingles catches and it rains down through the other flames. Little bright pieces of flame dripping down. Then I remember that hubby said we couldn't roast marshmallows over this fire because of the shingles. Not to mention, you'd need like a ten foot stick, because no way you're getting closer than that. So I find hubby.

Me: What about the shingles burning? Is that smoke dangerous?

Hubby: Well, I think it's okay as long as you don't go over and snort up a bunch of it.

Me: Really? Wow. Because that was totally my plan. Snort massive lungfuls of black poisonous smoke. Thanks for clearing that up.

He just looked at me. By this time the flames are shooting so far up that they are taller than the tops of the trees. I'm surprised the neighbors aren't worried and haven't called the fire department. Apparently they're used to it.

Hubby: Well, now it's a fire!

Me: Really? What was it before? Because it's looked like a fire to me the whole time.

Hubby: It was just a baby fire. Now it's as big as the ceremony fires we have for the OA.

Me: But it's summer time when you do those!!

Hubby: Yeah.

Me: But it's like super hot standing here now. It's like 90 degrees then!! Are you standing this close??

Hubby: No, we're standing way far back, but we're still sweating our balls off.

Me: Um. Why? (Wondering why the male species does strange things)

Hubby: Because it impresses the ordeal candidates. They talk about it for years.

Me: Really? Remember that time we were at the OA camp out and the fire was so huge that we were sweating to death and you got heat exhaustion? Yeah...good times. *shaking my head* Do guys ever think that bigger might not be better?

Hubby looks at the other two guys standing there. They all shake their heads.

Guys: Nope. That's just crazy talk.

Soon after I left and went home to make dinner. I left the guys standing around, staring at their handiwork, smoking cigars and patting themselves on the back.

♥Spot