The one where I explain that dinosaurs were stoners...

So things have been pretty serious on this blog lately and I feel like we all need a break from that. Mike is continuing to heal well and is now totally bored with being cooped up all the time. It's beginning to affect his sleep so I'm going to have to come up with something. Lu has decided on the splenectomy and we have an appointment with the surgeon in two weeks to discuss it. So things are progressing.

Sean has been gone alot working at Cub Resident Camp and then camping with his troop at Boy Scout Camp. But Thursday he went and took his entrance exams at the local community college. He's pretty nervous because he hates tests. He and Lu get that from their Dad. Personally, I think tests are fun. It's like playing Jeopardy. All I know is he was acing the math practice tests at home without even using scratch paper. Even the trig, which I never taught him because I dropped Trig my senior year so I wouldn't ruin my GPA. So fingers crossed that the real test went as well.

But it just so happened that the other night we were all home at the same time. And I walked out my room to find Sean in the doorway of Lu's room, talking to Lu & Luke. I'm not sure how we got to the discussion, but here goes~

Sean: You all need to start doing Meth.

Me: What? Why would you tell them to start doing Meth?!

Sean: Well, you've seen those billboards along the highway that have the cute little kid and then they say "Or Meth?". I don't know what message they're trying to send, but to me it obviously means that you have to choose kids or meth. Which means Meth is somehow a form of birth control.

Me: Huh...

Lu & Luke: *crickets chirping*

Me: So Meth renders you sterile?

Sean: I don't know how it works dude, it's just what the signs say.

Luke: So how much Meth do you have to do?

Sean: Probably a lot. Like you'd have to do it 3-5 times a day.

Luke: Holy crap! I think if you did that you'd be so high you wouldn't even know where your junk was.

Me: Thus making you incapable of using it! Abstinence is the best birth control so if you can't do it, well, there you go. You're a genius Sean!

Lu: Plus Meth makes you all gross and your teeth and hair start to fall out and your face breaks out so who would want to have sex with you?

Sean: See, I told you. Meth = birth control.

Luke: Speaking of drugs...M.S. came into our sheep shed (outdoor camping shelter) the other day and said "Nice decorations. All you guys need is some pot."

Sean: WTH?

Luke: Yeah, I don't know what he was thinking.

Me: Well, either it was an attempt at being cool and he thought maybe he'd bust you guys or he was just trying to make conversation.

Luke: Yeah, but the thing is the only decorations we have are a lamp, a fan and a dinosaur that Pants made out of clay.

Me: Oh. Well it was the dinosaur statue. It's a little known fact, but the dinosaurs were huge stoners.

Lu: Oh really?

Me: Yeah!

Luke: Well everything did supposedly grow bigger back then.

Lu: So the dinosaurs smoked week?

Sean: Don't be dumb Lu. How could they smoke weed? They don't have opposable thumbs! They ate the weed.

Me: Yeah. Just straight. They were hardcore. They didn't need any brownie mix with it.

Me: And that's why they died out. They were too stoned to prepare for winter and so the ice age came and they died. They were definitely grasshoppers and not ants.

Lu: Grasshoppers? WTH? I'm so confused.

Me: Really, that's a little known fact. I'm surprised M.S. even knew about it. *shakes head and walks off*

Mike: Did you just try to convince the kids that dinosaurs did weed?

Me: (trying to look innocent) No.

Mike: (continuing to stare at me)

Me: Um. Maybe?


As you can see, the silly still rules.
Happy Saturday,
♥Spot