Sean and I come up with ways to make money...

Want to know something weird? Ha! I don't even know why I bothered to ask. If you came to my blog, you either love the weird or you didn't know any better. So here you go- my butt hurts. Not in a gross way (my gosh, the places that comment could go...). But no, I meant like the muscles in the fleshy part. And since the Dr. grounded me from all sorts of physical exercise it's obviously not from that. But that's what it feels like. That muscley ache you get when you worked out too hard just enough. The only explanation I can come up with is that I must have compensated for the crazy knee by walking funny. And all that hobbling around (and if you must know, I had to kneel to clean out the fridge) must have overtaxed said sore muscle. Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. The arthritis medicine she gave me is actually working quite well and the knee doesn't hurt much until evening. Then it aches, but not too badly. I haven't even needed the vicodin except the first night.

So on to the funny stuff...Sean and I were on our way to town the other day~

Me: (I'm driving, he's riding shotgun) You know what makes me happy?

Sean: Pistachios.

Me: Oh yeah they do! But that's not what I had in mind.

Sean: Fountain Cokes.

Me: Oh gosh yes! But again, not what I was going for.

Sean: A really good scary movie?

Me: Oh definitely. *silence* Sorry, I got distracted.

Sean: A new book, lazy Sundays, vodka?

Me: Wow. I'm really easy to please, aren't I?

Sean: Yes. And distract. But do go on...

Me: Anyway, I was going to say air conditioning.

Sean: that does make you happy.

Me: I know right?! I'm so cranky when I'm hot! Know what my car (yes, the one we're riding in) doesn't have?

Sean: Air conditioning.

Me: Bingo. Know why?

Sean: Because you trusted Dad & Porky to fix something.

Me: Well, to be fair, Porky does have a degree in fixing engines. But yes, that's why. But the reason I trusted them to fix it is because I don't have any extra money. If I had a lot of extra money, I would just take it to a different shop and pay them to fix it because then I'd be guaranteed it was fixed. Otherwise I could take it back and demand that they fix it and presto! It's fixed. So basically, the point of this conversation, in case I lost you with my logic, is money. And how we need more.

Sean: Oddly enough, I was following your train of thought. So do you have a plan to get this money?

Me: Um. No. But I'm working on it. I mean I'm doing the freelance gig, but I'm definitely not going to get rich anytime soon. And because I'm doing the freelancing, I have less time for the fiction, so publishing a bestseller, that will then be optioned for a blockbuster movie, is maybe going to take a while. I need some more immediate cash. I got this email from this guy about this new business venture and the initial investment is pretty low and you get it back relatively quickly.

Sean: Is it legal?

Me: Um. I'm not sure. It looks like a pyramid marketing scheme to me. But there was a video on the website about how it wasn't a pyramid marketing scheme.

Sean: Uh huh. Well that makes it legit. NOT! Do you really think they'd tell you it was an illegal pyramid marketing scheme?

Me: No?

Sean: Of course not genius.

Me: Well, I don't know. Lu watched it too and said she'd sign up. And then I only have to get two more people... and I had my cynical New York friend check it out.

Sean: Hold up! You seriously took Lu's opinion into consideration? Have you lost your mind? Lu! She thinks the world spins faster when the wind blows. Not a reliable source. What did your friend say?

Me: *sigh* that she thought it looked to good to be true. I already knew it did. But I was supposed to start making $4000 dollars a month the first month. That's a lot of money. You know what we could do with that kind of extra money?

Sean: get the air conditioning fixed?

Me: Buy a new car. And go on vacation. Like every month.

Sean: Hmm. That would hamper my job schedule. Wait. If you were making that much money would I still have to get a job?

Me: Of course you would, you slacker. Geez. You owe me money. But just until you were 18, then I'd sign you up to make thousands of dollars a month too.

Sean: I think this is a bad idea. How do you know they aren't the mob?

Me: Why would they be the mob??

Sean: Because the mob has their hands in everything. Maybe they are the mob and the money is from killing people.

Me: Um. Well. If I didn't know that's what it was from I don't think I can be held responsible. So it's okay.

Sean: Nah, I'm going to stick to my plan...

Me: What's your plan?

Sean: I'm going to take over Slovakia. Then I'll have my own country.

Me: Why Slovakia?

Sean: Because it's small and no one really knows much about it. Then if I need more room, I'll annex the Czeck Republic.

Me: Um. It takes money to run a country. Where are you going to get that from?

Sean: I'm building weapons factories. We're going to become the world's largest manufactures of weapons.

Me: Mmmm. I don't know about this plan...

Sean: Doesn't matter...you're part of the mob, I'm not letting you in my country.

Me: But can I buy weapons?

Sean: Of course, if you have the money.

To be continued...


Happy Lazy Sunday,
♥Spot