The one where a hatchling leaves the nest and why I will never be famous...

A friend and blog reader emailed me the other day just to check and see how things are going in "Spotsville". I replied that things are hopping. And its true. I wish I could tell you all about it, but some things will have to wait. But first, I want to thank each and everyone of you for not only reading about my vida loca but also for caring about it. And to the many of you I keep in touch with outside the blog...I adore you.

So we are currently down in household size from 6 to 4. And no I don't mean because Mike is so busy working on the dining hall roof that he's hardly ever home. Although that is true and is a small bone of contention. I mean who else can say that the "other woman" is a tin roof her husband is building. Complete with "floating rafters" (whatever the hell that means). He even sent me a picture in a text message the other day of the roof. I answered "um. wow. It looks roof-y?"

No, Luke and Lu have called it splitsville. Well, actually, Lu decided it was splitsville and so he moved out roughly two weeks ago. Sometimes, things just don't work out and you have to move on.

And Bobby is leaving the nest. His brother bought a house and asked him to move in with him and his girlfriend. It's twenty minutes closer to town and not on a gravel road. We agreed that this was a good time for him to test his wings. We also made sure he knew that if it didn't work out he still had a home to come back too. I will miss him. And yet, I'm proud. It's a funny bag of mixed emotions.

And now for some random conversations that have taken place over the last few days:

***As Lu and I were standing in line to see the play "Forever Plaid" at the local community theatre:

Lu: *leaning over to kiss me on the cheek* Thanks.

Me: For what? The tickets were free.

Lu: No. For making me pretty.

Me: Um. Well, I didn't have a lot to do with that. That's more of a "thank the Universe" kind of thing. What brought that on anyway?

Lu: I was just looking around and looking at you and you're pretty and I look just like you, therefore I'm pretty too.

Me: Oh. Well in that case, you're totally welcome. You're really just glad I don't dress horrible and embarrass you, aren't you?

Lu: Yeah, that too.

***The other day when Mike came into my office in the middle of the day:

Mike: Are you working?

Me: Generally if you hear the keyboard typing non stop I'm working yes.

Mike: Oh then I won't bother you.

Me: You kind of already have so you might as well just tell me what you need.

Mike: I don't need anything.

Me: Then why did you come in here?

Mike: I was just checking on you.

Me: Checking on me how? What did you think had happened to me exactly?

Mike: I don't know.

Me: *sighing* well I'm glad we cleared that up. I'm fine thanks. I just bid on a new job. It would be a lot of articles though. I'd probably have to start taking myself a little more seriously and really putting in 6 to 8 hours a day.

Mike: you don't need to do that.

Me: I know. But I want to. And extra money would be nice, it would pay really well.

Mike: You don't need to do that because we keep you plenty busy around here taking care of us.

Me: Did you honestly just say I can't further my career because you and the kids are so needy?!

Mike: Yeah. That's pretty much it in a nutshell.

Me: You should probably leave my office now. *And that my friends, is why I'll never be famous. Because my family requires too much of my time.*

***Sean and I talking before he went to bed last night, Lu was in the room too.

Me: So who painted your nails this time?

Sean: Dawn at work. I need to take it off before Monday so she can do a better job. She was in a hurry.

Me: Are you going to take it off before your scout thing tomorrow?

Sean: Nope. I did the last one with sparkly pink nails that my supervisor painted.

Lu: Only you would be able to find a job where you get to do such ridiculous things and still get paid.

Me: Are you going to take it off before your date with Lizzie?

Lu: Where are you taking Lizzie?

Sean: Hamilton Family Diner. I promised her some ham fam next time she was back. And no, I'm not.

Me: I wish you would.

Sean: Why? Are you being gender stereotypical?

Me: No. I just don't like fingernail polish on guys. You know how goth guys wear black fingernail polish? I just don't like it.

Sean: It's not black. It's Burgundy.

Lu: *Explodes into giggles.* It's Burgundy!!

Me: I don't care what color it is, I just don't like it.

Lu: *more hysterical laughter* It's Burgundy!

Me: Um. Are you alright there Lu?

Lu: Yes. You guys just crack me up. You should blog this. It's Burgundy. *giggle snort*

And that's what's going on around here.

Have a great weekend,
♥Spot

Dear Blockbuster...we are over!

How could you do this to me? Really? Really?!! I can't believe you even tried to play this game with me. We've been down this road before and it ended badly. But I gave you a second chance. I put the past behind me and we started anew. I thought you'd changed. I really believed in happy endings. I believed in you. And yet, it's come to this. Words cannot express how much you've let me down.

Wasn't I a faithful lover? You know I was. I visited you every time I was in town. Every. Damn. Time. Why? Because I loved you. I spent hours with you...walking up and down the aisles...caressing you shelves, lovingly touching the movies, reading aloud the synopsis. Remember that time, in the horror aisle, when I shouted in unadulterated joy at finding a copy of an obscure horror classic? Remember "Dead and Breakfast"? I guess at least, we'll always have that...

And yes, I know sometimes I left your embrace to visit Library. But it wasn't the same. My love for the two of you is so different. One could not possibly detract from the other. In fact, my love for Library only enhanced my love for you. You shared so many of the same stories.

What really gets me, what cuts me to the very core of my being, is that I introduced you to my children! And they too fell for you. But you've been changing lately, and I could see the writing on the wall. But yet, I persisted in believing in you. I turned away from the lure of the Red Box and stayed true to you. And then this!! How dare you impose a dollar a day fee for every day I'm late bringing back a rental?? WTH?? You know I live far from you. You know I don't intentionally keep the movies longer. You know me!! I thought our relationship was built on trust? But now you've thrown it all away! And for what??! Greed?? Love of the green backed whore??

Well this is it buster. I won't take it!! I'm not going to melt into a hott mess. No. I'm leaving you. Keep your "four nights for four dollars" attitude and play that game with someone else! And an extra dollar for every day over charged to my credit card? Puh-lease! No one else treats me that badly.

I'll get over you. Don't you worry about me. Red Box has been calling my name for months now. And Netflix? Oh yeah I've had my eye on him too. Don't you worry baby, I'll bounce back. But will you??

Take your new rental policy and shove it.

Love, Me

Damn that Spidey Sense!

Okay so I'm getting to this blog really late today but it's okay because I already put dinner in the crock pot so I'm not in a hurry or anything. Yeah I was productive today. Go me! I did three loads of laundry, put spicy deer chili in the crock pot, made all the beds, swept the kitchen, straightened and vacuumed the upstairs. And I tried to get by with not doing this. I tried to use Jenny's the house is not messy it's a "creative haven" line, but I wasn't even buying it so I knew I couldn't sell it to anyone else and I was going to have to knuckle down and do some work. Also, because even though it's only been like 4 days since I vacuumed I could probably have knit a sweater or two out of all the cat fur on the carpets. Which really grosses me out. So I was productive. Which can also be translated into boooorrrrriiinnnggg.

So about my spidey sense. You guys are gonna think I'm really weird or crazy but that's okay because I'm pretty sure alot of people think I'm crazy and everyone has their own "thing" you know so maybe crazy is my "thing". My spidey sense warns me of impending doom. Okay it also lets me know when people are pregnant or the phone's gonna ring or someone wants me to call them. Like today when my sister in law texted me and was all "guess what" and I just somehow knew that she was pregnant again but I didn't want to ruin her moment so I was all like "I don't know. What" and she was "I just found out I'm pregnant". And I was all "congratulations! that's awesome!" instead of yeah I know. Or when I call someone and they're all "I was just thinking about you" and I don't say "Yeah I know. What do you want?". Or I tell the kids to go get the phone and they say it hasn't rung yet and then it rings. (This used to really freak my husband out but now he's either okay with it or pretends he is). I know I'm totally freaking you out right now with my awesome psychic powers right?! Yeah, don't get excited, it's not like I can predict winning lottery numbers or anything else remotely useful.

But the spidey sense has been really helpful when raising teenagers. My daughter once asked me if she could go to a party (and I know the standard parent answer is no because it's a party but that's not how we do things) and I said "No. I have a really bad feeling about it" and she stopped asking because they know you don't argue with the spidey sense. The party got busted and everyone there got arrested and lost their drivers licenses. The spidey sense lets me know when they're lying too. You'd think that would make them never lie to me but they're teenagers so they really aren't that smart and then they get in even more trouble for lying when they should have just confessed. The sucky part about the spidey sense is knowing when something is going wrong in their relationships. Like I always knew when my daughter and her boyfriends were going to have huge fights or if she was being cheated on or lied too. You'd think that would be good, but it's not really. Because then you're forced to either keep quiet and get the ice cream ready or be the bearer of bad news. Let me tell you it's a tough call.

Sunday my son came into the family room and said that his girlfriend had to cancel their date. That she had a scholarship application due and a speech to write. Now, this isn't really odd because she is a very scholarly girl who works really hard at school but it sent off a remote tingle in the spidey sense. So I sent her a text (yes, she texts me frequently) and said "good luck on your scholarship thingy" and she didn't text me back. More alarm bells. I mentioned this to my daughter who texted her and said no it appeared things were fine and Lizzie said how sweet Sean is to her. But I couldn't stop the spidey sense. I told Mo that Lizzie was going to break up with Sean. Fast forward to Tuesday evening. We are on our way home from town. Both kids are texting. I'm driving and singing.

Sean: Lizzie says she needs to talk to me. She's going to call the home phone.

Me: (and Mo in complete unison) Uh oh.

Sean: What?

Me: when a girl says she needs to talk, it's never a good thing. Sorry buddy.

Mo: Mom said Sunday night that Lizzie was going to break up with you. So you should break up with her first. Or at least act all relieved when she says it.

Sean: (turning to me) seriously?

Me: 'fraid so. Sorry.

And she did. She said it just wasn't working out and they didn't get to spend enough time together. Which we all know in girl speak means there's another guy. He hung up the phone and came to the dinner table and said "you were right". But he wasn't too bummed. I mean there are lots of other girls. And he saved that $40 bucks he would have spent on dinner and a movie Sunday. And he got a freakin tattoo that day so now he's bad ass. But not too bad ass because he didn't pretend to be relieved or break up with her first or anything. Because he thought that was mean. So he's a nice bad ass. He did however call me a witch the next day and tell me that I was probably gonna get burned at the stake or something. But they totally don't do that anymore. Right?? RIGHT???!

♥Spot